Perfection and Time

It's the most wonderful time of the year.... cue Staples commercial. In three weeks, I'm going back to UofT for my third year. :|  2 more years until I enter real life...unless I get into med or pharm.

Its time to start taking things seriously, especially my time. You have no idea how much I waste time...I think one of the reasons I waste so much is that I don't know what to do with it. Yes, I should study. But study what and how? Whenever I start to study, I start thinking "there must be a more efficient way to do this" or "I'm doing this wrong". Then I give up. Yes, I am a perfectionist. The sickness that helped me so much during high school is killing me in university.

In high school, there was always time to focus on the nitty gritty details so one could always get every last mark. In university however, time is like a fluid slipping through my hands. I spend more time worrying how I can save it than actually utilizing the time I have. After 2 years, you would think I learned how to manage my time. No and my dismal GPA reflects it. Well, if I haven't put much work into my schoolwork, I must have good extracurriculars and a great social life, right? Wrong. I was so worried about studying that I disallowed myself from doing anything else.

I read a blog where they suggested make a list of stuff you accomplished every year. I made one and realized that I wasted YEARS of my life. A year is a significant amount of time, and to not accomplish much in that span of time is horrible. You should try it - this list will really open your eyes.


This year, I will not allow perfectionism to rob me of my time and life. This year will be different...but not perfect.

The Small Magical Things

When I saw this...I couldn't help myself. I was overloaded with cuteness!!! Oh gosh..this just made my whole day better.

A Truly Wired Experiment - Day 4

First of all, sorry guys for not updating yesterday. I was actually doing my homework, but its still not a great number : only 3 hours.

Today, I did 1 hour. Why? Because its Friday. Because tomorrow my family is coming to my house so I had to help clean. Because today is Diwali and I went to the Gurdwara and then lots of fireworks. Who wants to do homework on a day like this?

So, I realized yesterday that without Facebook, I feel a small nagging sense of isolation from the rest of the world.. I don't know what everyone else is doing!!

Also, I realized it was a reflex. I started up FireFox and I automatically typed in "Facebook" in the google toolbar and clicked on the link. A few seconds later, my senses caught up to me and I was like: Why am I here? And, although I don't use the extra time to do any homework, I know I save an extra 20-30 minutes every time I would've logged in but I didn't. I use that time to go on Yahoo Answers and I even cleaned my room.

I am happy because I have a 4-day weekend (YAY). Thank you UofT for giving me a reading week of two days to catch up on the month's work I'm behind in...it was very generous of you (not..why can't you make it a week like everyone else?).

Bye!!!

A Truly Wired Experiment - Day 2

It is 24 hours since I decided to undertake the task of abstaining from Facebook and YouTube for a week. And, I have survived so far. I wanted to mention, but I forgot yesterday, my usage habits. For Facebook, I use it mainly to check what everyone is doing, comment on statuses etc..but I don't get a lot of messages on my wall and such. For YouTube, I use it for music and for videos from subscriptions.

I found it was a bit harder to resist YouTube...especially since I knew there would be new videos and I wanted to listen to new music I did not have on my iPod yet. I didn't feel any compelling urge to go on Facebook, probably because I knew I wouldn't find anything there. So overall, the first day was easy..all I had to do was constantly remind myself but no overpowering willpower was required.

Now, in the morning, I was optimistic about the day, hoping to accomplish a lot of things with my spare time. However, my brother caused me to be very irritable and angry. Upon reflection, it sounded like I was suffering withdrawal symptoms (Lol)..but more likely, I was mad that my brother broke through my optimistic bubble by wasting two hours.

Study Hour Count: I'll say 4 hours (but I took a lot of time to do some simple stuff...so I don't see it as an improvement)

Maybe tomorrow, I'll feel the real withdrawal symptoms and my willpower will have to overcome some epic battle with my craving, but that's for another day.

P.S. I'm almost done "Pillars of the Earth", so look forward to my first BookWorm review soon!

The Boy Who Lived

On a totally different note, I have to say I am absolutely ecstatic about the new Harry Potter movie. Is it weird to say that sometimes I lose my breath (and my heart starts beating fast and I get all excited) whenever I think about the books?

I am hoping to watch the midnight show (my first one ever). I know, I am totally late. I feel so deprived now that Harry Potter is almost over (although it will never be over in my heart and I'm sure many others), that I never was involved in any sort of Harry Potter events. No book releases at Chapters, waiting in line at midnight, going to see if I could see any of the actors or J.K. Rowling herself...this is considerably harder by the way because I live in Canada.

Anyways, I loved the 7th book (especially the ending battle) and am particularly looking forward to Ron and Harry's fights...they always amused me. I get sort of upset that they don't show the full extent of the books, including the violence. For example, I was imagining that Harry did like some blood spurting thing to Draco in the 6th book..but maybe I was just a bit over imaginative. Anyways, I'm getting off topic and I'll probably be posting a hundred more posts like this until the movie comes out so yea.

P.S. I've decided to start a "BookWorm" blog in this one. Its very basic. Every time I finish reading a book, I'll write a simple review about it here.

A Truly Wired Experiment - Day 1

So, today I decided to endeavor on a little journey. I am going to spend the next week without Facebook or YouTube. I know, its been done before and for greater lengths of time and extent but I want to experience for myself if I really feel like I'm coming off an addiction.

What inspired my decision? Today, one of my professors was talking about how Facebook is a disembodiment of our souls. It really got me thinking. We put our souls on the computer to say to everyone, "Hey, this is me. Pay attention." It has become a part of our identity, and people perceive us through our actions, not only in real life, but on the Internet as well. I decided to add YouTube in it as well because I spend a lot of time on it.

The results of this experiment are yet to be seen. Maybe I'll have so much time, I'll get a lot more studying done...or I might study just because people are (hopefully) reading this. Or maybe, I'll just fill up the extra time with more useless procrastinating activities, such as watching TV ( oh, how I love The Office) or walking back and forth to fridge to check if there is any food that can magically give me the energy to start studying. Or perhaps, the time I gain by not using Facebook and YouTube will be spent on this very blog talking about the experiment.

During this next week, I'm going to see if I lose a part of my identity, if Facebook really is crucial and I will be recording how many hours of studying I do every day. For comparison, I would say I do 3 hours a day regularly. I know its horrible, but I really am trying to change.

So here's to discovering one's true self and if we really are that wired to the Internet.

The Stress of being in University

I have an essay due in two days. 2 days but only 1000 words. Not a catastophically hard topic (but not simple either). I shouldn't be that worried, right? This is nothing. Wrong.

I am a scientist, not a writer. But I never had trouble with it. In high school, I aced every writing assignment. But coming to university, I feel as if I forgot how to write essays...I literally have NO clue. I don't know what happened. Maybe its the idea that I'm not a humanities student so there's no way I would know to write as well as they would.

Its what happens to everyone. You can't do something because something is holding you back, saying you can't.

I just need to pull myself together and concentrate.